Art of Transliness

Gender Neutral Relational Terms

Being trans* has a tendency to make one aware of all the gendered terms out there. “Boyfriend”, “Girlfriend”, “Brother”, “Sister”, “Aunt”, and “Uncle” leave little room for ambiguity, which can be frustrating for non binary identified individuals (and even, sometimes, for binary identified trans* people as well). For those of you who are uncomfortable with people using gendered terms for you or for those of you with a close friend/family member/whatever who is uncomfortable with gendered terms, here are some options, some already mainstream, some invented.

*Instead of brother or sister, you could use “sibling” or “sib” 

*For niece or nephew, “nibling” or “nephling” (both are used as a gender neutral term for a niece or nephew on urban dictionary) or “sibkid”. 

*Instead of aunt or uncle, have your nibling come up with a nickname for you (for example, my niece calls me “T”, which was once short for “auntie” but now is perfectly gender neutral) or just invent something like “untiee” (a combination of “uncle” and “auntie”). 

*Boyfriend or girlfriend can easily be replaced by “partner”, “significant other”, “SO”, “lover”, or “sweetheart”. 

*Similarly, husband and wife can be replaced by the above words (particularly “partner”) as well as “spouse” 

*For mom and dad there’s always “parent” or “parental unit” (as well as endless possibilities for made-up names, which we absolutely encourage)

*EDIT* This post is intended to give people suggestions for terms they can use for themselves/asked to be used for themselves or other family members if they (or their family members) are uncomfortable with gendered terms. This post is NOT intended to tell people not to use gendered terms or to get people to use the terms suggested above.